I've come to realize that one of the most terrifying things for humanity is to be truly and unabashedly yourself. Why is it so challenging? Because authenticity and vulnerability promote the risk of rejection. It's not easy to let people see the true you and open yourself up to mockery, because what if they don't like the real you? Recently, a guy- whom I had recognized but had never spoken to, randomly asked me what kind of music I listen to. He had this big smirk on his face as I answered his question. He then informed me his reason for asking was because he had seen me "jamming" while I was doing homework. At first, I was a little embarrassed and even apologized for being weird, but then I realized that this was an awesome way to be recognized, because he saw me being myself, with no mask, and he appreciated it. I've come to realize that one of the most terrifying things for humanity is to be truly and unabashedly yourself. Why is it so challenging? Because authenticity and vulnerability promote the risk of rejection. It's not easy to let people see the true you and open yourself up to mockery, because what if they don't like the real you?
Authenticity- putting yourself out there and being real with people, is absolutely worth every chance of rejection. What you may believe is the slightest chance of acceptance is worth not pretending to be fine. It’s worth it to let someone see the real you, because if they’re worth it they’ll love on you regardless. Successful and prosperous relationships are based on vulnerability, otherwise they are only surface level with no roots to sustain them. I’ve been hurt so deeply by rejection, because I was finding my value in human approval. It feels like you've been completely knocked off your feet and there isn't a person in the world who would understand. I see people like this all the time. I see people whom I hold with great value and respect, hide their passions and insecurities from the ones who are supposed to be their greatest allies. Whenever I witness such a masquerade, I'm almost taken back by it. I've seen the other side, and I want to just place my hands on their shoulders and, while shaking them, scream they are worth so much more than imperfect validation. I've been devastated by disapproval, but I’ve also felt sincere love and unremitting acceptance. Being authentic with the people in your life is incredibly important, but more than that- it is vital to find your identity in God. He is constantly trying to challenge and strengthen you; He loves the most wretched and beautiful parts of you all the same. Being real with God and surrendering your need for human approval seems like the scariest thing in the world at times, but it's not a risk; His love for you is a sure thing. If you find your worth and value in His acceptance, then there won't be anything preventing you from living out your most authentic life. This is a lesson that I am still learning. It isn't an overnight phenomenon- it has taken a lot of really strong people who have stuck by me through my stubbornness and have come alongside me to tear down the walls I had built, before I was even able to acknowledge this weakness in myself. I’m not immune to rejection, I still feel things very deeply - the good and the bad, and it is still painful. However, I believe God allows us to experience hurt to make us stronger, so we learn to depend on Him. Sometimes it takes an ocean of hurt where it feels like we're drowning, before we finally surrender it to Christ. It isn’t always easy, but it is always worth it.
2 Comments
Keri
3/10/2018 10:09:54 pm
Very true and very powerful thought that we must find our identity and acceptance in Christ and then live out that identity. I think there’s a flip side of that that’s also true. When someone in our life boldly lives out THEIR true self, we have a responsibility to accept and value them just like we hope to be accepted. That can be harder but every bit as important as we reap what we sow!
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Adriana
3/11/2018 10:57:36 am
Unbelievably true , I try to find myself in the midst of it all . Im a loud outgoing adventurous girl . Some people calk me annoying and I look back anfd reply as At least I am me and not you . No need for a a double copy . You attempted to let me down , but failed cause as me to be me I'm not going to hurt someone as you tried to do me ..
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"Choose everyday to forgive yourself. You are human, flawed, but most of all worthy of love."
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